Top Twelve Courses For Married Men (If You Want A Happy Marriage)

Top Twelve Courses For Married Men (If You want A Happy Marriage)

12 – How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy – Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and
       Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

11- How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion                                                                                                                     Relaxation Exercises, Meditation, and Breathing Techniques.

10 – How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays
Step by Step Slide Presentations.

  9 – The Toilet Paper Roll – Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.

  8 – Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat 
Group Practice.

  7 – Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

   6 – After Dinner Dishes – Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video

   5 – Loss of Identity – Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other 
Hot Line and Support Groups.

    4 – Learning How to Find Things – Starting With Looking In The Right
         Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum

     3 – Real Men Ask For Directions                                                                                                                                       Real Life Testimonials

      2 – Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.

       1- Learning to Live – Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing.

Have a wonderful weekend. Be safe and keep writing.

monkey-bride

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111 thoughts on “Top Twelve Courses For Married Men (If You Want A Happy Marriage)

  1. Ahahahaq 😀 Such a great laugh!!! Oh my.. were you a fly on my wall? But my dear Andrew, I fear for your life. You might as well ask for witness protection. If all these women will show this to their husbands…. gosh I can only imagine what they will do to you.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Bravo! Written from a perspective only a man can truly understand (although every woman will naturally claim she can). These are the real keys to success in a marriage. The only addition I may offer as a 56 year old man with a nearly 13 year intact marriage is:
    Every morning before either person gets out of bed, I encourage every man to gently cup his wife’s face, gaze with admiration directly into her eyes and whisper the words, “I’M SORRY” for you know the whole day lies ahead and those two simple words will be needed at some point. Staying ahead of the curve by having a bag of reserved “I’M SORRY’s” is the ONLY edge a man can hold. 😀

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Pingback: Top Twelve Courses For Married Men (If You Want A Happy Marriage) | ' Ace Friends News '

  4. If seen this info before, but like most men, I threw the instructions away and tried to figure out how to put together the bike on my own. Needless to say, I’m no further along than I was forty years when I said, “I do.”

    Liked by 2 people

  5. That is hilarious! We have the toilet seat issue sorted – the lid is always down. Sadly, the direction asking is just left to the chatty wife who usually drives (control freak) and stops at gas stations to ask for directions while the husband is still trying to work his GPS, Recalculating…:)

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Did you know there is a follow-on now available for
    9 – The Toilet Paper Roll – Does It Change Itself?
    9a – The Toilet Paper Roll – Over the top or down the back, which way does it go?

    ps – awesome post! I should have read these .. maybe the marriage would have — no it wouldn’t have. But this list looks like awesome reading 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Lmao, those were funny! Except that I think I personally need #11 myself; I was in the bathroom when that “shopping is fun!” gene was handed out lmao! I just do not understand the female way of shopping – which seems to me to consist of a lot of looking around, trying on endless items of clothing and then never buying anything, and hours of boredom. I really short-changed my poor daughter on that “fun” female activity 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hahaha. Yeah, you’re daughter is missing out on so much fun. My ex would go to the mall because she needed a pair of red shoes. She would try on a million things. Touch another thousand. Browse through everything. And walk out with another pair of black shoes and not the red she needed. That meant we had to return the following weekend. I love to go shopping with my wife. She does the woman thing in condensed form. My wife accuses me of having the “female shopping gene.” lol Thanks for stopping by.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Pingback: Lonely Author: More Top Ten Marriage Courses For Men (If You Want A Happy Marriage) | The Lonely Author

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